Mumitul Mimma(Translated by Tahiya Islam):
Isn’t sexuality a very normal issue? This normal issue becomes creepy when you ask anyone on social media chats to indulge in sexual activities with you at late hours of the night just knowing the person for only two days. Many people do not understand that everyone does not possess the same ideology about being open and interested in being involved in sexual activities like you.
So before asking someone to be sexually involved with you through social media chats, you should at first, understand whether the other person is interested to be involved in this activity with you or not. Because not everyone thinks that being sexually involved with another person at late hours of the night is the definition of enjoying life. In most cases, after being rejected by the other person, many people consider the other person to be narrow-minded. Sometimes, it is also considered that the other person is asexual.
You can be a believer of the saying- “Love and lust not for the same person”. But you should also know that there are people like me who do not believe in being sexually involved with other people except their partners. So, you would have to be disappointed if you go to a person like me and give a sexual proposal so that you can go to bed after masturbating thinking that you do not need to love the person to gain sexual pleasure.
There is no fault in being sexually crazy for your partner. But if that craziness only prevails on the basis of physical pleasure, then you should be careful in indulging yourself with others. Because there are many people who fabricate their need for physical pleasure with love and fool others into believing otherwise. I am against this kind of people and there are many people who think the same. Polygamy and unnecessary desperation for indulging in sexual activities are in no way acceptable.
It is not necessary to tell everyone about how horny you feel at late hours of the night or how do you want to get. physical pleasure. Everyone has the same body structure and possesses similar feelings as yours. But not everyone is interested to talk about it.
I have a friend who shows two kinds of images. One he shows in front of elders where he is the perfect pious male and the other he shows in front of his girlfriend where he cannot stay a minute without inappropriately touching her. If then he is reminded that all the touching is Haram in Islam and then he defends himself by stating that he considers his girlfriend as his wife, so it is not Haram. Why are we only blaming the guys? Just the other day, I heard the story of a junior of mine. He is tired of turning down his girlfriend’s approach to having sexual intercourse.
Those who are up for it, let them do. But why are you forcing someone to be involved in something that they don’t want to do?
A girl cannot pass a single day normally after getting proposals like this via inbox from a guy. In some cases, the girl becomes weak and keeps on crying. This is entirely mental torture. You are alright because to you, that is normal. But to her, it is not which just worsens her mental stability.
You are indulging in cyber-crimes by sending people with these vulgar proposals. According to DebarotiHalder and K Jayshankar the definition of cyber-crime goes something like this- “By using the modern technology and network, if someone tries to harm others by impersonating them or harassing their images and their physical and mental sanity, then it is considered to be a cyber-crime.”
We all know the story of Sushant Pal because of the screenshots. There are many people out there who become vocal about what to do and what not to do after a breakup. Once a known writer texted me and asked if I had any dark past. Then he advised me to go to bed with my boyfriend. It seemed like sex is the solution to everything. But I found the most logical solution by removing him from my friend list.
Please, girls, raise your voice against this nuisance. We must be united against these. There is a law for cyber-crimes but you also have a screenshot option on your phone. Please take screenshots of unpleasant incidents and save them or post them so that others can be aware as well.
Please don’t reply “You are weird” in Sushant’s “Sexy Girl” text. Please write “You are a bastard”. When your boyfriend says- “Baby, you have to do this and that” then please reply “I don’t like doing anything like that.” If a bold reply doesn’t work then try to get rid of the sexual pervert from your life and start respecting yourself. The person who is forcing you to have sex chat with him will be that person who will ruin the relationship that you will have with your husband. Because he believes in forcing his way in, he does not care what you think or want.
Remember, online is a very broad place full of facilities. But due to some uncivilized people, many are scared to make the best of use it. Try to keep in mind the dark side of technology. Always remember that a deer is the worst enemy of its own flesh.
Guys, please be respectful. Before giving anyone any kind of proposal, please think about what are you doing and why are you doing it? The principal sister of Holy Cross College said, “We cannot be intimate with whoever we want to. This one sense has made us different from animals.”
Please stay away from any kind of sex chat on social media. Please, keep in mind that sex chat doesn’t work for everyone.
Note:
The writer refers to a sex-chat controversy in Bangladesh.
The writer is a passionate feminist, writer, social worker, and student of Jahangirnagar University.
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Tahiya Islam is currently living in Selangor, Malaysia. Apart from her love for writing, she has a knack for public speaking as well. Her career goal is to become a teacher and be a motivational speaker.